My Littlest Helper

As you know I'm a mother. If you're a mother, or maybe even a father, you know that there is no way possible for you to have anytime alone. For example... let's say a quick, very needed trip to "the potty"..... Yea, if you're not a mom yet.. I beg you relish the time you spend in the bathroom! Go there now... I'll wait.....

Oh back so soon... were you followed? No... you lucky ass thang!
Okay so a couple of weeks ago I shacked up with the queen of all bummers... PMS. And of course my darling LuLu toddles into the bathroom with me. Minding her own business of course.. She had no idea what wonders were to come next. When I walked into the bathroom I grabbed a tampon from under my sink, sat down and started talking with her about her day.

Were you good a maw-maw & paw-paw's today? (not family, but conviently trained to be called it)
Yesh
Did you play with the babies?
Yesh
Did you have fun?
NO...Whas sat? (I'm not paying attention to her at the moment, I'm doing my business. She's walked over to me, is standing in front of me, looking betwen my legs, with her little forefinger pointing..)
What's what? ( I'm not going to try to make a big deal out of anything that happens in that area - the last thing I need is a teenage mother on my hands in 11 years or so.. give or take)
Whas sat? (I'll spare you the total details but let's just say she watched with amazement)
That's mommy's lily
Why?
Because mommy had to pee? (As I throw away the trash)
Whas sat?
Trash
Tra? (as she walks over to the trash can with her arm stretched out)
No, that's not for you. Trash is nasty. Please leave the trash in the can.
Na-ey?
Yes, nasty
Why?
Because that's mommy's tampon and you don't need to mess with it.
P-pon???
Yes mommy's P-pon.
Okay...
And that was that...

Now on the other hand EVERY time I go to this particular bathroom... she of course toddles along with me and offers me a P-pon. She's even handed me one a couple of times, Once she handed me one in an orange wrapper and when I told her No, I didn't need it and to please put it back. She did but got out one in a purple wrapper and said "Purpa P-pon?" Ah, my little helper... and so smart!!
She's such a big help, She's even offered her daddy a P-pon - HA!