let's see how this works.. I didn't change to a new blog but changed my name.. just might work.. if someone had the old name and googled it - they would see that the blog wasn't found.

hmmm.

thinking of moving my blog...

Last night it happened again. On my way to take Punk to stay with his dad and stepmom for the weekend, LuLu notice what street we were on and said "that's the street to go to my school" Which began a conversation about how she wouldn't be in the same school as Punk at the same time but he had gone to those schools. And how one day she'd go to the school he's going to go to next year. To which Punk replied "What if I don't go to that school next year? What if I go live with my dad?"
Now from what I understand this is a statement or a conversation that happens alot with Punk's dad and possibly stepmom. But not so much here. When he mentions it here, it's mostly out of the blue like this time and I feel like I've been missing something. I mean, how does he get to this conclusion. I know I couldn't wait to leave home when I was his age.. but I didn't have a parent in another home.. I only had me and graduation. (can't say "wait til you graduate to him" everything I say goes in one ear and out his mouth to his dad... and usually Punk's translations leave something to be desired)
So, what I'm left with is.... Punk won't talk to me about his feelings and why he want's to move. I mean I'm no dummy I understand his need for his dad but then he tells me that he loves his stepdad (Hubs) just as much as his dad.
I'm going to be a SAHM soon (so I'll be home more for him and my other children) I've pointed out all the reasons that he could/should/(please don't go)stay. School's are better, More opportunities, Friends are here, he won't have to start over, I'll be able to help more, get to know him more, be there more... I know this probably isn't about me... personally. It could be more of a teenage "I can't stand my parents", "If I lived with my dad things would be different" thing. But I can't help but scream on the inside... WAIT! STOP! you're my baby! I need to have you where I know what's going on... where I can make sure you're okay... where I can protect you... where I can watch you grow, and do homework, and make sure the school is doing what it's supposed to for you and see you, and hear you... PLEASE!!!!! DON'T LEAVE ME!!!!

So do I bolt the doors and windows? Or watch my first baby bird fly... at 13...

New job, new duties...

I began training on Monday for the temporary position that I accepted. I went in on Monday to find out that I would be proof reading loan documents that are being prepared for subordination. Can anyone say B-O-R-I-N-G!!! On Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday combined, I may have actually worked for a total of 7 hours - including lunch on all three days! I also found out that we don't have access to computers, we're not allowed to bring in books, radios or any other distractions. But in the case where there's nothing to be distracted from... I ask you.... seriously??
Today, I trained on a different task and actually worked all day. It was very different and very good. I trained to key the documents that I'd been proof reading the three days before.

Take the Journey 2010 - Reading Challenge

Joyful over at New Horizon Reviews posted this challenge from another blogger, I'm joining if you're interested the directions are included at the end of the post.
Thanks Joyful!!



TAKE THE JOURNEY 2010 Reading Challenge
A. Challenge ends on December 15, 2010. Your goal is to accumulate as many points as you can during 2010. Best of success to everyone. I can't wait to begin. All points must be accrued from Jan 1 - Dec 15, 2010.



1. Read 40 or more books by new authors you’ve never read before. (Each book read =4 points)2. Read 20 or more books by some of your favorite authors. (Each book read = 2 points)3. Read 3. or more new genres you’ve never tried before. (Each genre = 2 points)

4. Post 12 or more reviews at any site of your choice. (Each review posted = 3 points)

5. Give 1 or more books as gifts during the year. (Each book gift = 2 points)

6. Read 1 or more books to a child (Each book read = 3 points)

7. Read something to an older person, or anyone whose eyesight prevents them from reading for themselves.(Each reading session = 3 Points)

8. Share this reading challenge with a friend. (Each friend that joins the challenge = 3 points)

9. Attend a book event, such as a book signing, book fair, book reading, etc. (Each event = 5 points)



B. Additional Points

1. 30 Points – Become a follower of Between The Pages blog

2. 5 Points – For each month you post your point total updates in our Take The Journey group at Book Blogs.

3. 30 Points – For adding our Take The Journey badge to your blog or website.Please sign up at Between The Pages

Punk asked me yesterday, via text message from school, if he could go to a dance after school today. We'd basically not had any problems so I said sure. His dances are usually no problem since they begin directly after school is over and you just go pick up your kid at 5PM. So, no running back and forth to home and school - easy peasy.
Last night he asked me for $4 for the ticket, oh "and can I have a $5 more for food?" I stopped at the ATM on the way home and got a $20 (the smallest bill that will come out of our ATMs) and gave it to him. Remembering that he only needed $9, I asked him to bring me the change after the dance.
When I went to pick him up, he handed me $5. The rest of the conversation went something like this...
"Where's the rest of the money"
"Huh, What money?"
"The rest of the money that you were supposed to have for change. I gave you a $20, you needed $9, there's supposed to be at least $10 in change here. And you just gave me a $5."
"Uh, I don't know"
"What do you mean you don't know, did you count the money you were given back?"
" uh, I guess so"
"Write down everything you bought and how much it cost"

So he proceeds to write down the ticket, two slices of pizza, a bag of chips and a drink - it came to $8.50.

"So, where is the rest of the money?'
"Huh, Mom I don't understand what you mean... "
"What you wrote down totals $8.50, right? You just gave me $5, right? What is 8 +5?"
"13"
"Yes, so we've accounted for $13.50 of $20, right? Where is the rest of the $20?"
"Oh! I don't know."
"Did you buy anything for anyone else?"
"Yea, No I mean No... I didn't"

like 15 minutes later at home... he's gathered $5 worth of change from what he says was his room, but only after I told him if he couldn't tell me where the money went that he owed me $5 and he would no longer go to the dances. Then I tried to go over the totals with him again.

"Did you buy anything for anyone else?"
"Yes, I bought someone a drink."
"Why didn't you write it down?"
"Because you said to write down what I bought. And I didn't buy it, I just gave them the dollar and they bought it"

Seriously, just between me and you... when I have these conversations with my extremely intelligent 13yo (who refuses to apply himself, even with temptations of love or money) I can literally here my brain stop and say... "Wait, What did he just say?" It's like my whole body pauses... to say... "can you say that again"

I love him with my entire being.. not divided by several others but the whole thing.. without my kids and my Hubs I ain't nothing... But I can literally have a conversation with my 4yo better, easier... than I can have the same conversation with my 13 yo.
Is it boys vs girls? Is it boy vs mom? Is it teenager vs stupid authority figure? Is it ADHD vs non-ADHD?
There's so much I want to teach him.. but we can't seem to get any of it broken down into parts that he will retain or for that matter wants to hear. So... do I give up? Let him find his own way with no guidance what so ever? I don't think that's the kind of mother I am... at least not for my 4yo... but he's almost demanding it.

I need everyone to be there.

Picture it... my office, November 17th, 2009. There are four cities that my department is in. An email went out to one of the cities that was copied to me, a meeting scheduled for the following day & everyone required to attend. I had an appointment for LuLu's eyes to be checked on the 18th and wouldn't have been able to attend the meeting. Long story short, went to my manager and asked if our site was also required to attend. We're not usually required to go to meetings so when he said "I really need you to reschedule your appointment, I need everyone at the meeting" I knew it couldn't be good.
I went home that night thinking about what could possibly be going on.

1. they want us to dress business casual
2. they're blocking all internet access.
3. they want our department to go to third shift only.

I must've come up with a dozen or more things that I thought it could've been, hoping it wasn't what I dreaded.

Meeting time came and we all congregated in the tiny little room. The last to arrive was our manager. He came in with huge envelopes and sat down. "Well, what I have to say to you isn't going to be easy so I'll just come out with it. We've been displaced."

He went on to tell us how we would be reassigning our remaining business to the departments that would remain with the company. The four sites that came over during the merger which included my site would work as quickly as possible and leave the building as soon as possible. Our active employment would be until December 4th. The our inactive employment would begin and go through until January 19th. Then our severance packages would begin and continue based on each individual's date of service. As you can probably imagine, it hit us all like a ton of bricks.

Then on the 25th... they offered us temporary postions....

to be continued